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Suppressing the Urge to Spoil My Daughter

April 6, 2011

I have made it through the toddler phase with three boys.  With my daughter, shopping is such a different experience.  Because Fred Meyer gave her a sticker a couple times, she asks for them now every time.  My boys never asked for stickers.  They were out one day and she looked devastated.  It was heart breaking.  The boys would ask for candy and if denied, they would start screaming. 

Today I went looking for a pre-filter for my air purifier and one of the employees said, “It’s in the Barbie aisle.”

THE BARBIE AISLE?!   Ugh.  I knew this wouldn’t be pretty.  The aisle had baby dolls and everything else that appealed to girls.

And they were out of the filter I needed.

I tried to coax my daughter out of the aisle and she gave me the most pathetic look ever – lower lip trembling, puppy dog eyes, and then she slumped forward like she was going to throw herself to the ground.

I had this conversation with myself:

“If you bought her something, it would make her so happy!  Don’t you want to see that adorable smile on her face?”

“Yeah, it would make her happy, but then she would expect something every time we go to the store and eventually she won’t be grateful.  She’ll be spoiled.”

“Maybe just this once?  Look how sad she looks!”


“She’s going to scream and I’m going to have to carry her kicking and screaming out of here.”

“You sure are.  Be strong.  Tell her she can ask for it for her birthday.”

So I did.  Of course, I carred her kicking and screaming until she calmed down and found something else to be upset about.  At the moment, she’s mad because she wants candy for lunch.   I think I’ll go to Home Depot for the filter where they have no dolls or anything else she likes.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. April 10, 2011 5:28 pm

    You are a heroine! Keeping little girls from being spoiled is definitely heroic work. And besides, that’s the job of her grandparents. Gotta keep the division of labor in Ordnung!

  2. April 10, 2011 6:23 pm

    Thank you! I try hard not to spoil my kids without making them feel totally deprived too. Haha! Her grandparents would agree.

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