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Warning: Female Related Post

June 26, 2011

Here’s a hypothetical situation.  Let’s say you went grocery shopping and purchased everything you could possibly need except for one thing:

Feminine hygiene products

And let’s say your monthly visitor comes a bit early unannounced and all you need is that one thing from the store, but you can’t actually justify buying anything else.

Do you:

A.  Buy only the feminine hygiene products, not caring about the fact that you’re basically announcing you’re on your period

or

B.  Buy some random, unneeded items in hopes of kinda sorta concealing the fact that you’re on your period.  You know, as if to say, “I’m just buying these in case I need them.  It doesn’t mean it’s actually happening at this very moment.”

While out with my best friends the other night, I discussed this hypothetical situation with them and joked that you could make it extra interesting for the cashier by purchasing the following:

Maxi pads

Tampons

A pregnancy test (“What?  Why would this woman need feminine hygiene products and this?” the confused cashier thinks to himself.)

Condoms

Midol

Lots and lots of chocolate

Monistat 7

Preparation H

Not that the cashier would actually say anything, but one of them did ask me years ago while buying a pregnancy test, “Is this a good thing or a bad thing?”  I was a newlywed and looked very young for my age, so she probably had concerns about what appeared to be a teenage pregnancy.  Still can’t believe she asked me that though. 

What would you add to my hypothetical list?

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. June 26, 2011 7:50 pm

    What are husbands for? Send him to the shops :)

    • June 26, 2011 11:07 pm

      OK, but “hypothetically speaking”, let’s say it’s 11pm when you discover it and your friends have to drive you back to your car where you had dinner. One’s husband might not want to hear at 11:30pm, “Can you pick me up some Always overnight pads with wings? No. Not the heavy flow. Overnight! And wings! It has to have wings!”

  2. June 26, 2011 10:35 pm

    In my twenties it would have been B. In my forties it’s definitely A … the fact that I still get my period is a testament that I’ve still got a little girly girl in me.

    • June 26, 2011 11:10 pm

      Haha!!! Yeah, maybe when I’m 40 I’ll have the urge to flaunt my still present fertility. :-D I’m 36. I think I’m starting to lean towards, “Yeah, I menstruate! Deal with it! And put my one item in a plastic bag, please.”

      • June 26, 2011 11:12 pm

        You know it’s true love when the guy is willing to buy them for you. It’s either the pads or stain his sheets … with those choices … he has no choice but to hightail it to the store.

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