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Parenting: Acknowledging Bad Behavior In Your Children

August 16, 2011

Why do some parents feel like their child can do no wrong?  I bet they get on their kids’ case plenty at home for various things, but when a teacher calls attention to bad behavior, suddenly their child has been victimized.

I don’t get it.

It is hard to hear when your child does something wrong, but it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent.  Every child makes mistakes and will learn, but if we don’t acknowledge that they’re misbehaving, they not only repeat the behavior, but they learn that Mom and Dad will come to their rescue no matter what.

I was very impressed with the mom who recognized her daughter as one of the rioters/looters in London and called the police herself.  I know that couldn’t have been easy, but she’s a wise mom who knows it doesn’t serve her daughter to protect her from the consequences of committing a crime.   You can read the story here.

In contrast, another mom is being charged with obstruction of justice.  Her son fatally wounded a man during the riots.

It’s fascinating to me that one mother has the strength of character to turn her daughter in and another tries to cover up her son’s crimes.

As a mom, I tell my kids’ teachers at school and church that if they misbehave, I want to know immediately so I can correct the behavior.  I am not going to be offended.  Sure, I won’t be happy, but those negative emotions will be directed at my kids, not their teacher.  One day at church, I had a meeting with one son’s teacher due to some inappropriate humor with all of the boys.  While coloring pictures of a baptismal font, one of them colored the water yellow and said, “Look!  The boy peed in it!”

My son drew an extra body part when they played Hangman.  Ten points to whoever guesses which part that would be.

I didn’t take it personally.  I remember being into potty humor as a kid and it’s not as if my parents trained me to be that way.  Pretty sure.  Well, maybe at least 60% sure.

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